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Chapter 13 records the story of Amnon, David's oldest son. Matthew Henry comments here, "We do not find that David's children imitated him in his devotion to the Lord, but, his false steps they walked in."
Obviously, Amnon was aware of what his father had done to Bathsheba. Parents need to realize the consequences of setting a bad example. There were, because of numerous wives and concubines, many half- brothers and half-sisters. Amnon, whose mother was Ahinoam, fell in love with his half-sister, Tamar, whose mother was Maacah. The boys and girls were not kept apart as it appears in the Living Bible, but they were closely chaperoned when they were together. Amnon could not get Tamar alone to himself.
It would appear that Amnon was so full of lust that he began to look like he was sick. Now Amnon had a friend, his cousin, by the name of Jona-dab. He was a son of David's brother, Shime-ah. Jonadab noticed his cousin's plight and came up with a plan. First, he tells Amnon to go to bed and pretend that he is sick. When his father comes to check on him, suggest to him that he might feel better if he had something to eat. Then suggest that he send in Tamar to prepare it for him. Well he did this and it worked. David sent Tamar in to prepare some food for Amnon. She prepared some bread and brought it in to him, but he refused to eat. He then ordered the servants out of the room and then told Tamar to bring him the bread and feed him. When Tamar did this, he demanded that she get into bed with him.
Now Tamar tried to reason with him. Notice, in the translations, what she says to him:
"No, my brother, do not do this to me." "Do not be foolish." "You know what a serious crime this is in Israel." "Where could I go in my shame?" "You would be called one of the biggest fools in Israel."
She not only tried to get him to stop but she comes up with a logical and legal solution. "Speak to your father, the king, he will let you marry me." But Amnon would not listen and he raped her. Then his lust turned to hate and he forced her to leave his room. She went away crying. She tore the robe that she wore that symbolized her virginity, and put ashes upon her head.
Well what happened to Tamar? She lived an isolated life in her brother, Absalom's, quarters and Amnon became despised by Absalom for what he had done to his sister.
To get revenge, Absalom decided to have a feast and invite his father and all his brothers, but David his father, declined on the grounds that there would be to many to prepare for, but finally, after much urging by Absalom, David does allow all his sons to attend the feast. At the feast when Amnon became drunk, Absalom ordered his men to kill him. Then the rest of David's sons leave on their mules.
Word gets back to David that all his sons were killed and he arose and tore his garments and laid on the ground. Then Jonadab, David's nephew, told David that it was not all his sons but only Amnon was killed and he by the command of Absalom who had determined to do this ever sense he learned that Amnon had raped his sister, Tamar.
Absalom, fearing what his father might do, went to Geshur, east of the Sea of Galilee, to his mothers home, to live with his grandfather, Tal-ma-i. He stayed there 3 years; giving his father, David, time to get reconciled to Amnon's death. Eventually, David longed for his son Absalom. Joab, David's Commander-in-Chief, notices how much David missed Absalom, so he decides to try to get him back to Jerusalem.
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